Sometimes it takes moving away from a place you know well to really be able to appreciate it.
Having lived abroad for many years, one of the things I have come to value most about Devon is the friendliness and openness of the people who live here.
Feeling part of a community and having positive relationships with others are both so important to our own sense of wellbeing, but anyone who has ever lived in a big city will know how easy it can be to feel isolated even when you are surrounded by thousands of other people. It isn’t the number of individuals that makes the difference but the quality and depth of your relationships with them.
Here in Devon it feels as though most people have just that little bit more time to stop and talk to others – something invaluable in terms of our general sense of wellbeing. You might not always realise how much a spontaneous conversation with a stranger can positively affect the week of another.
New friendships can spring up in the most unlikely places too. I have been pleasantly surprised to find a couple of new friends in Dawlish’s swimming pool of all places!
The reason I’ve been there so much is that I recently signed up to do a sponsored swim for the Alzheimer’s Society. It’s in memory of my mother who died from the disease seven years ago.
Not being very fit, the swims have been a bit of struggle to be honest and although I would love to say that it’s getting easier I can’t say that that’s the case yet.
However the big plus for me, (apart from the satisfaction of raising a few pounds for charity) has been the opportunity to meet some really interesting local people.
Never once would I have thought that of all the ways to meet new people, swimming would be an obvious choice.
With your head in the water most of the time it doesn’t seem like the first place to strike up a conversation.
However, it only takes a minute when you are taking a breather between lengths for someone to smile, ask how your day is going and for a conversation to suddenly strike up.
As someone who has had homes in many different places over the years, I have learnt that one trick to finding new friends is to consider every conversation as the start of a potential new friendship. Much of the time a conversation may be nothing more than a one-off encounter, but often you will find that you have something in common with someone which could be the basis of a new friendship.
In just the last few days at the shallow end of the swimming pool between sponsored lengths, I have had some interesting chats with one lady who I’m now meeting up with for coffee. I’ve also met a gentleman who turned out to be in the same line of therapeutic work and we have agreed to keep in touch on wellbeing and other issues.
Who knows who else will suddenly appear before this sponsored swim is completed! The point is, you never know when you will meet someone who will turn out to be a lifelong friend.
Most people have experienced loneliness at one time or another in our lives. And feeling that you don’t have any real friends can be soul-destroying.
If that is you right now, please don’t give up. There are many other people who are also looking for new friends – you just have to find each other.
So the more you get out there, strike up conversations with people and treat each one as a potential new friendship, the more chance you have of meeting the people who will turn out to be the friends you simply hadn’t met until now.