LAST week I wrote about the art of listening and how valuable it can be for someone to be authentically listened to. This is even when we as the listener don’t have the solutions to the problems we are hearing about.

A few moments after I sent the article off, I kicked myself, because although I had given several reasons why being listened to can be so important, I hadn’t mentioned one of the most central ones – which was the gift of time.

Then I thought that maybe this wasn’t such a bad thing after all as I could write this week’s column on exactly that.

‘The gift of time’ is a phrase that all of us will have heard of – but at least for me personally it took a long time to get my head around what this really meant.

Two things have changed that though.

One is becoming older myself. I realise now that the best memories I have of the past are not any presents I might have received or the places I have visited, but the time that has been spent with people who matter to me.

This is even more the case when I think about people who are no longer here.

The other thing is hearing from people so often about how they feel unvalued and unseen either at work, at home or both.

I have also been struck by how often this connected to feeling that others simply don’t have time for them.

Every one of us has different demands on our time. Some of us will feel pulled in a hundred different directions because of family, work or other commitments.

Others might feel they have too much time on their hands and don’t know what to do with it.

Either way though – we all have the same number of minutes in the day and have to make constant choices as to how to use them.

It took me a long time to recognise that if someone chooses to spend some of those precious minutes with you – then actually they are giving you a gift which can’t be replaced.

As a mother of seven children I sometimes look back and wish I had understood this better when my older children were growing up.

I worked long hours when they were young and tried to get them things I thought they would like.

At the end of the day though, the happiest memories they have involve us spending time together and doing the simplest of things.

With my younger children who are still at home, I now try to concentrate more on giving them time than gifts.

People who are at the end of their life also frequently report that quite apart from a bucket list, what they most want is to spend time with the people that matter to them.

The amount of time we have is finite, both in terms of the minutes in the day and also in terms of our lives in general. When you think of time in this way it makes it even more valuable.

If someone chooses to spend their time with you – see it as the precious gift that it is.

It might also be worth thinking about the people in your life.

Is there someone who would appreciate a gift of your time – whether through a conversation, a phone call, a coffee or a walk in the park?

The best thing about the gift of time is that it doesn’t need to be wrapped and doesn’t need to cost anything either – but despite that it can be one of the most valuable gifts you will ever give.